I’ve only dated the same sex but I’m still attracted to the opposite gender. My gf wants me to call myself a lesbian, because I’ve only dated women, but I think that not only brushes off lesbian who’ve dated men (before they realized, to perform heteronormativity, etc), and it’s trying to erase my identity. Am I really bi if I only date girls?

Hi there =) 

I totally understand where you’re coming from, and I agree with your points; both about it invalidating lesbians who’ve dated men before, and in the fact that it’s not right to push a label on you (even if she means well).

Yes, you are really bi even if you only date girls. The fact that you have the capacity to be attracted to more than one gender is what matters: acting on these attractions is another case entirely. You could choose to only date women and it would still be perfectly bisexual.

So, bottom line: label yourself however you want based on what you feel most comfortable with! =) 

– Mod Elena ?