© not as much tho i think bc I repressed it a lot when I was younger. But I feel like such a fraud. I really don’t know how I identify. I feel like the only thing that’s kept me from identifying as bi all these years is internalized biphobia but at the same time I feel like I don’t have the right to use the label since I’ve been in a relationship with a boy for most of my life. At the same time I don’t know how to start a conversation about this with my bf. I told my friend who is ©
© who is also bi about this the other day and she kind of brushed it off saying I’m probably feeling like this just because I’m very involved with the lgbt cause and feel like I wanna be a part of it. I’m scared I’m a fraud but at the same time… do straight girls experience all this repressing and all this confusion? How can I be sure of my identity? 🙁
Protip: many of us aren’t 100% sure of our identity, and it’s 100% okay to question or be confused…for days, weeks, months, years…it’s OKAY to not ever be CERTAIN. Internalised biphobia is probably causing this uncertainity, since you’ve repressed it for so long. But if you ask me, being attracted to girls, and also to guys? Very very very bi. Super bi. Amazingly, beautifully bi as hell. You have every right to use bi because…you’re obviously bi.
Also screw that friend, you’re definitely bi? You’re attracted to multiple genders, you like girls and guys, you don’t NEED to date other people to “prove” you’re bi to anyone! All that matters is that you’re attracted to more than one gender, which you are. Just because you’re with a guy and you’ve been with him for a long time doesn’t make you any less bi! Bi people who have only dated one gender are still bi! Seems like they’re being quite biphobic (bi people can also be biphobic, sadly, due to internalised biphobia) and I’d call them out on it. Tell them if they don’t accept you and believe you, then they can find a new friend. You’re definitely not a fraud.
And I’d just bring it up in whatever way feels comfortable to your boyfriend! Bring him to the side, tell him you wanna talk to him about something. Tell him, “I am bi”, let him ask questions and dispell any myths and misconceptions he has about bi people. Affirm to him you still love him and want to be with him, just that it’s important you’re open about your true self with him BECAUSE you love him and trust him.